SERMON: 40 Days of Love: Love is Patient, Love is Kind

40 DAYS OF LOVE SERMON SERIES:

LOVE IS PATIENT, LOVE IS KIND

Preached at Naylor UMC 15 February 2009

 

I. Introduction

    -- turn in Bibles to 1 Corinthians 13:4. "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud."

 

    -- David Langerfeld, the pastor of Harrisburg Baptist Church, writes about his wife every Valentine's Day to thousands of e-mail subscribers around the country -- he talks about her beauty -- how her family had come to America from Sweden and how she had the classic Scandinavian appearance with blond hair, blue eyes, long slender legs, and soft, blemish-free skin -- but her real beauty, he writes, is internal -- becoming a Christian at an early age, she is characterized by the beauty that comes from integrity and honesty and kindness

    -- David and his wife met in college, and it was love at first site -- they were married one week after they graduated, and would spend every waking moment together, doing all those things young married couples do -- going on bike rides -- travelling -- going to movies -- watching TV -- eating out

    -- his wife taught school for a year and then became a bookkeeper for a surgical supply company -- one day, while she was working, for no apparent reason, she lost her balance and fell on the floor --  She was later able to get up and went to see a doctor that night -- He referred her to a neurologist.
    -- The next day, it happened again -- For no apparent reason, she lost her balance and fell -- this time, though, she couldn't get up -- she had lost all feeling in her legs -- they wouldn't move -- David came to the office, picked her up in his arms, and carried her to the hospital -- after six days in the hospital, the doctor gave this beautiful, active young lady the dreadful news --  She had Multiple Sclerosis and she would continue to deteriorate.
    -- all of their future plans and dreams changed in a moment with that diagnosis -- David and his wife had only been married for 18 months -- and now he was faced with a new and overwhelming challenge -- caring for a wife whose physical health would continue to deteriorate and who could not be the healthy vibrant woman that he had married

    -- many men in this situation would have left -- in fact, in a large percentage of the marriages where a spouse has MS, the other spouse leaves them -- the other spouse won't stay committed to the constant care and the continual physical, psychological and mental changes that continue to occur

    -- but David was not like other men -- over the next 30 years, David stayed with his wife and loved her as her condition worsened -- when her bones became brittle, breaking easily, David was there to help her get around -- when she went from a walker to an electric scooter to a wheelchair, David stood by her side -- when she could no longer feed herself, write her name, or control her own bodily functions, David continued to love her with patience and kindness -- even now, when someone has to stay with her 24 hours a day, David has never left her side
    -- 1 Corinthians 13 -- the Love Chapter -- describes for us what love looks like as it shows us dynamic, powerful expressions of love from the heart of God Himself -- the descriptions of love in this chapter tell us how God loves us and show us how we are to love each other

    -- in our key verse for today, Paul writes that "Love is patient, love is kind" -- those two aspects -- those two characteristics of love go together hand in hand -- patience is about attitude -- kindness is about action -- and together, these two combine to produce loving acts that mirror the Savior's heart

    -- David Langerfeld could only express his love for his wife in these two ways -- it was the attitude of patience that enabled him to stand by his wife during her deteriorating condition -- and it was kindness -- love in action -- that demonstrated his love to her during the most trying of times

    -- this morning, as we continue in our 40 Days of Love sermon series, we are going to look at this tandem idea of love being patient and love being kind

 

II. Patience

    -- let's begin with this idea of patience -- as I said, patience is about your attitude -- your perspective -- the way you think and feel about someone or something

    -- and this is important -- because if you don't look at someone or something with eyes of love -- seeing the positive in the midst of the negative circumstances and events that surround you -- there is no way you will be able to display patience -- endurance -- perseverance -- as you interact with that person or thing

    -- so what is the secret to patience -- how can you have patience and have a right attitude with those people who cause problems and irritations in your life?

    -- you cooperate with God as He seeks to develop you into a patient and loving person

 

    -- God's part is to provide the circumstances    -- the Bible teaches that God allows troubles and trials and circumstances to come into our lives to teach us how to be more patient -- to teach us how to rely on Him -- to teach us how to love like Him

    -- love must be tested in order for it to be real -- if David's wife had never developed MS, neither of them would have known or experienced the depth of love that came from that trial in their lives -- through that circumstance, God turned David into a person who was loving and patient and kind -- not only with his wife, but with all the people that he met

    -- remember that God's word tells us that in all things, God works for the good of those who love Him -- for those who are called according to His purpose -- this tells us that no matter what circumstances God allows in our lives -- no matter how challenging the trial or the storm that we are facing, God is using it to bring about good in our lives -- molding and making us more like Him through this process

    

    -- our part in learning the secret to patience is to provide the response -- to have an attitude that approaches trials and storms with faith and trust and the knowledge that God is working through us to make us better people

    -- there are three things that we can do that will help us respond to every circumstance with patience

    1. Discover a bigger perspective -- look at it from a larger point of view -- wisdom is seeing things through God's eyes -- leads you to not being bothered by minor irritations --Proverbs 19:11 says that "a man's wisdom gives him patience; it is to his glory to overlook an offense."

    2. Deepen your love -- love is a patience-builder -- When you're filled with love, almost nothing will irritate you. But when you're filled with anger; almost anything will irritate you

        -- John Eldredge once wrote about how everyone these days seems to be filled with anger -- the slightest irritation sets them off -- he said he was driving in traffic and a man cut him off -- he blew the horn and the other guy got angry and started yelling at him -- both of them were so angry at this minor irritation that they were ready to kill each other

        -- impatience says more about you than it does the other person -- we must learn to love like Jesus loved

    3. Depend on Jesus' power -- this is the only way to love like Jesus loved -- this is the only way to respond to every circumstance with patience

 

    -- so, patience is an attitude -- it is a choice that you make to love someone in spite of the circumstance -- to endure and persevere through trying times

    -- so, what is kindness? -- as I said earlier, kindness is about action -- it is about putting feet to our faith -- hands to our love

    -- perhaps the best place to see kindness in action is in Jesus' familiar parable of the Good Samaritan -- so, if you would, please turn with me to Luke 10 and let's finish up there

III. The Good Samaritan -- A Portrait of Kindness

    -- as we look at this passage, there are four lessons in responding with kindness that we can learn from the story of the Good Samaritan

    -- look with me now at verse 30

 

30. In reply Jesus said: "A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, when he fell into the hands of robbers. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead.

31. A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side.

32. So too, a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side.

33. But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him.

 

    -- the first lesson is to start seeing the needs of people around you -- Jesus tells us that when the priest and the Levite saw the man, they walked on by -- but when the Samaritan saw the man, he recognized the need

    -- kindness begins with the eyes -- kindness means being sensitive to another person -- seeing and responding to their needs

 

    -- the second lesson we learn here is that we must sympathize with people's pain -- when he saw the man's needs -- when he heard his cries for help -- Jesus says that the Samaritan's heart went out to him -- his heart was filled with pity -- with compassion -- he sympathized over the condition of this man

    -- kindness begins with the eyes -- sympathy begins with the ears -- in order to love people with patience and kindness, we must not only see their needs -- we must listen to their hearts

    -- there's a clip from the Ellen DeGeneres show that is making the rounds through e-mail and on YouTube called, "I drink a little, but I love Jesus" -- it's an extremely funny clip, but a lot of Christians have been objecting to it because of Ellen's lifestyle choices

    -- but, as Billy Bob Briggs pointed out in an article on Serve E-zine, Christians have something to learn from Ellen -- this clip shows that Ellen is a master of two skills that the Samaritan displays here in this passage

    -- first, we must genuinely listen to people and not just pretend to be polite -- the priest and the Levite were polite, but they didn't listen to the cry of the man in the ditch -- the Samaritan listened with his heart and responded in love -- secondly, we must accept people for who they are and celebrate them as God's unique creation -- the Samaritan could easily have walked by because he was of another race -- a race looked down upon by the man he helped -- but he didn't -- he saw the needs -- he heard the cry -- and he loved the man in the ditch for who he was

    -- Galatians 6:2 says, "Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ." -- by listening with his heart, the Samaritan carried the burden of this man

 

    -- verse 34

 

34. He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine.

 

-- the third lesson we learn here is to seize the moment -- Carpe Diem -- Seize the Day -- don't wait -- don't delay -- do what you can, when you can, at that very moment

    -- To be a kinder person like the Good Samaritan you must be willing to be interrupted -- the Samaritan stopped what he was doing and went to the man in need -- Jesus did the same thing -- He always allowed Himself to be interrupted by the needs of others -- the lesson here is "be spontaneous"

    -- when the Samaritan saw the man, heard his cries, and had sympathy for him, he stopped and took action -- he stopped what he was doing and went to the man and took action -- he didn't walk on by and think, "I'll tell the authorities when I get to the next town" -- he didn't say, "I need to get supplies first" -- no, he did what he could with what he had at that particular moment -- he used what resources he had with him -- just like we need to use what resources we have with us when we see someone in need

    -- also, to be a kinder person like the Good Samaritan, you must be willing to take risks -- the Samaritan stopped and took action even though the robbers could still be around -- it could have been a trap -- the robbers might have left the man there to lure another person into their grasp -- but the Samaritan stopped regardless -- he took a risk to love this man

    -- he also took a risk by stooping down to get to where the man was -- this man was laying on the road -- and in order to love him, the Samaritan had to go to where he was -- the Samaritan's actions show us that to be kind to people, you have to get on their level -- face-to-face -- eye-to-eye -- don't look down on them -- go to where they are and love them in that place -- regardless of the risk to your reputation or the risk to your physical well-being

 

    -- look back at the second part of verse 34

 

34. He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, took him to an inn and took care of him.

35. The next day he took out two silver coins and gave them to the innkeeper. `Look after him,' he said, `and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.'

 

-- the final lesson we learn here from the Good Samaritan is that we must spend whatever it takes -- there is always a cost to kindness -- but true kindness is going something for somebody else without expecting anything in return -- what did the Good Samaritan expect in return for his help? -- nothing

    -- this encounter cost him -- but he got nothing in return

    -- Jesus tells us that the Samaritan put the man on his own donkey -- took him to an inn -- and continued to care for him -- when he was leaving, he left two silver coins to pay for the continuing care of this man -- the Greek word here is "denarius," a coin that is worth a full day's salary -- when's the last time you spent two day's salary to help another person that you weren't related to?

    -- there is a cost to kindness -- whether it's financial or physical or spiritual -- to truly love someone else, you have to offer them a part of you -- just like the Samaritan did here with the beaten man -- and just like David Langerfeld continues to do with his wife

    -- so, why be kind? -- if it's just going to cost you, why would you do it in the first place? -- we are called to love in kindness because God was kind to us through Christ -- giving us atonement for our sins through Jesus' death and resurrection -- secondly, God blesses kindness -- kindness begets kindness -- kindness spreads the love of Christ in tangible ways -- from us to others and from others back to us

    -- kindness may have an immediate cost to us -- but God has already covered that cost through His grace and mercy and love

 

IV. Closing

    -- in closing, I would like to read you a quote from Charles Sheldon's book, "In His Steps", which started the "What would Jesus do?" movement

    -- in this book a tramp, a man without a home and without a job has been going from church to church looking for help, and in the last church in town he asks for permission to speak to the congregation. This is what he says right before he collapses on the altar and must be taken to the hospital:

    "I'm not an ordinary tramp, though I don't know of any teaching of Jesus that makes one kind of tramp less worth saving than another. Do you? I was wondering as I sat here tonight, if what you call following Jesus is the same thing as what He taught. What did you Christians mean by following the steps of Jesus?

    "I've tramped through this city for three days trying to find a job and in all that time I've not had a word of sympathy or comfort. What is meant by following Jesus? What do you mean when you sing "I'll go with Him, with Him, all the way? Do you mean that you are suffering and denying yourselves and trying to save lost, suffering humanity just as I understand Jesus did? What do you mean by it?

    "It seems to me there's an awful lot of trouble in the world that somehow wouldn't exist if all the people who sing such songs went and lived them out. I suppose I don't understand. But what would Jesus do?"

 

    -- this morning as we seek to learn how to love with patience and kindness, let's take a moment to consider if we are truly being examples of God's grace and love to others or if we're just passing the needy by like the priest and the Levite

    -- are we truly loving the Lord our God with all our heart and with all our soul and with all our strength and with all our mind? -- are we truly loving our neighbor as ourself? -- Are we truly loving with patience and kindness? -- with right attitudes and loving actions?

 

    -- this week, I want you to put this lesson into practice by selecting one person to love -- one person to reach out to -- and I want you to do something practical and tangible for them -- some act or some gift of love that meets a need in their life

    -- this means you'll have to see their needs -- you'll have to listen to their hearts -- and then you'll have to respond in patience and kindness

    -- it could be something like babysitting for a busy mom -- collecting and giving out food or clothes to a person in need -- sitting and praying with someone going through a crisis -- or welcoming a new neighbor with a welcome basket and a smile

    -- what you do is up to you -- but I want to challenge you to do something

 

    -- Brandon Heath has had the number one song, "Give Me Your Eyes," on the Christian charts for over four months now -- this morning, as we close in prayer, I'm going to offer up the chorus of that song as a prayer for us as we seek to respond to those around us in patience and kindness

    -- let's pray

 

    -- "Father God, we want to love others as you love us -- we want to be people who are patient -- who endure and persevere through trials and circumstances -- who demonstrate loving acts of kindness to all we meet

    -- Lord, you know how hard this is -- you know how difficult it is for us to love like this in our own strength -- so, this morning, God, give us your eyes for just one second -- give us your eyes so we can see everything that we keep missing -- give us your love for humanity

    -- give us your arms for the broken-hearted -- for the ones that are far beyond our reach -- give us your heart for the ones forgotten -- that we might love them as You love us